3/4 of the original strip
Used with permission.
Used with permission."If [the Reavers] take the ship, they'll rape us to death, eat our flesh, and sew our skins into their clothing. And, if we're very, very lucky, they'll do it in that order."
— Zoe Washburn, Firefly
A common tag on to threats of sexual violence, mutilation and death, the phrase "in that order" (or alternatively "not necessarily in that order") works by implication of bizarre forms of punishment achievable by switching the order around. It can be used in a serious context to raise a scary threat to levels of Squick or in a comedic context to just make the acts seem ridiculous.
Used a lot with "barbarian raider" types. "Remember: it's rape, pillage, THEN burn."
Can be combined with Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking, if the "final" punishment would be pretty inconsequential following the others.
It is also very common to simply imply the trope by stressing the word of ordering. God bless italics.
Examples:
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Anime and Manga
- At one point in Excel♡Saga, Excel tells Hyatt, "You were in a tight spot back there, Ha-Chan! If I hadn't jumped in, you would a' been buried... then murdered... then defiled!" to which Hyatt can only respond, "In exactly that order?"
- Implied in My Hero Academia. Towards the end of their rematch, All For One admits to still having nightmares of the sight of All Might coming at him with his guts hanging out. A bit of logic tells the audience that All Might was Gutted Like a Fish... and then beat All For One into years of recovery and permanent blindness.
Comic Books
- Darkwing Duck: The "Campaign Carnage" arc has a Played for Laughs example. After Suff-Rage has hypnotized the city against Darkwing and Launchpad, to the point where they're ready to burn them both alive, Doofus Drake (visiting from Duckburg) says that, "We've got to save Launchpad and Darkwing! You know, maybe, in that order..."note
- What's New? with Phil and Dixie has a comic with a sad-faced Eastern dragon standing in a karate pose looking at a burned foot, with his tiny ancient elder trainer saying "No, no. Spin then flame then kick."
- Die Zumutungen der Moderne by Nicolas Mahler (about his life as cartoonist) has a somewhat unconvincing example, as the order is not that relevant. While the comic boheme does smalltalk, one member shocks them by claiming he will reduce his life to the absolutely necessary, "television and masturbation — not necessarily in that order".
Films — Live-Action
- The first movie of Brazilian comedy group Casseta & Planeta: "Go out with your hands up and suicide! Not necessarily in that order!" (Two characters react with "They got us! We're FUBAR!" "Not necessarily in that order!")
- In Dead Man, the character Cole Wilson is known to have killed, raped, and eaten his parents, in that order.
- In Hannibal, this is referenced in the following exchange regarding Hannibal's interest in Special Agent Clarice Starling:
Mason Verger: So what do ya think, Cordell? Does Lecter want to fuck her or kill her or eat her alive?
Cordell: Probably all three, though I wouldn't want to predict in what order. - In The Messenger: The Story of Joan of Arc, the young Jeanne d'Arc is traumatized when her village is attacked by English soldiers, and she is forced to hide and watch as her older sister is murdered and raped, in that order.
- In Money Train, Charlie and John get chewed out by their unhealthily aggressive supervisor for misconduct. Patterson (the supervisor) claims that if they screw up again, he's going to "fuck them dead". Charlie and John then discuss and try to figure out if he meant fucking them before or after they're dead. They come to the conclusion that "Either way, it's a pain in the ass". Later in the film, John makes a point that they need to stay one step ahead of "that necrophiliac Patterson".
- In Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, the mermaids will take you to the bottom of the sea, drown you, then eat you. Sometimes, however, they will do it the other way around.
- From Planet of the Apes (1968): "If they catch you, they will dissect you. And kill you. In that order."note
- In The Running Man, Amber Mendez's friend tells her she was lucky to survive an encounter with Ben Richards: "You're lucky he didn't kill you, too. Or rape you, then kill you. Or kill you, then rape you."
Literature
- Air Force One Is Down by John Denis has a less-lethal version. Criminal mastermind Mr. Smith is busted out of prison by his henchmen, and as they're escaping in a convoy of vehicles Smith says he wants "a safehouse and a woman, in that order." The Dragon replies that if he wants to change that order, the last car in the convoy is carrying a woman for him.
- The Dresden Files: At one point, the protagonists run into Sigrun Gard, who had recently been disemboweled during a fight. Thomas comes to the conclusion that Gard had beaten up the opponents, and then gotten her wounds. Harry corrects him; she beat up a fallen angel while her guts were hanging out of her side.
- In Hannibal, a psychologist attempts to explain Hannibal Lecter's attachment to Clarice Starling; his patron, Mason Verger, impatiently asks, "does Lecter want to fuck her, kill her or eat her?" The psychologist replies, "probably all three, although I wouldn't want to predict in what order he wants to perform those acts." This quip is reproduced, more or less faithfully, in the film version.
- In The Horse and His Boy, Lasaraleen says that any servants disobeying an order will "first be flogged to death and then be burned alive and after that be kept on bread and water for six weeks".
- In Interesting Times, the bordering-on-senile Silver Horde have to be reminded of the proper order and that it's rape the women, burn the houses (though given their age, it's unlikely they'd have managed to rape either).
- The beginning of Mostly Harmless claims the following:
Anything that happens, happens.
Anything that, in happening, causes something else to happen, causes something else to happen.
Anything that, in happening, causes itself to happen again, happens again.
It doesn't necessarily do it in chronological order, though. - The Murderbot Diaries: The villains of Network Effect aren't impressed when a pissed-off Murderbot turns up on their doorstep. "How boring. Angry, then afraid, then dead." Murderbot proves to be not so boring when it hacks their Attack Drones, snarking, "Angry, then afraid, then dead. Is that the right order?"
- A Song of Ice and Fire:
- The sadistic Ramsay Snow likes to hunt women with dogs. If they are "lucky", and he thinks they put up a good fight, he'll kill them and then flay their skin and will name a dog after them. If they aren't lucky, he'll rape them and then flay them alive.
- According to Oberyn Martell, Ser Gregor Clegane raped his sister, murdered her, then killed her children. He's wrong. As Gregor informs him: first he killed her children. Then he raped her. Then he "smashed her fucking head in, like this".
- In Valerie: A True Memoir, author Harlan Ellison recounts how someone had a habit of spreading rumors about him, then returns the favor by remarking, "What a nasty thing to say, particularly from a man who lures six-year-old boys into the basements of churches and then defiles, kills and eats them, not necessarily in that order."
- This quote from The War Against the Chtorr: "Life is short. Then you die. Then the worms eat you. Be grateful it happens in that order." Chtorran gastropedes are giant worms that eat people alive.
Live-Action TV
- Altered Carbon: Lizzy has become transhuman enough to predict the future (in a Mad Oracle manner), which she sees as "Salvation... death... retribution." Poe quips, "Perhaps you could tell me in what particular order?"
- In an episode of Aquí no hay quien viva, the boy Mauri and Fernando have adopted as their son turns out to be an Enfant Terrible who steals the radio from Juan Cuesta's car. The neighbors are not too pleased:
Concha: I'm going to call the social services before this kid kills and rapes us all!
Emilio: Well, as long as it's in that order... - Blake's 7: In "Moloch", a brutal Federation soldier is said to enjoy; "women, food, and inflicting pain — in no particular order".
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Ditzy vampire Harmony kidnaps Dawn in a plot to lure Buffy into an ambush. However, her vampire minions quickly lose patience and decide to drink Dawn's blood and kill Harmony, "maybe not in that order".
- In Coupling, Susan invites Steve over for dinner. When she's ready to go home and start cooking, she says to him, "You can come and watch... in that order."
- Doctor Who:
- The Doctor's line from "Meglos": "First things first, but not necessarily in that order."
- In "The Snowmen", Strax, a Sontaran who's been assisting the Doctor (and really, really just wants to kill something), gives his recommendation for dealing with an intruder:
Strax: Suggest we melt his brain using projectile acid fish, then interrogate him. [everyone stares at him] Other way 'round.
- Firefly gives us the page quote, which is used in the "scary threat" sense and underscores how dreaded and utterly insane the Reavers are in the 'verse.
- Game of Thrones:
- In their duel, Oberyn demands that the Mountain makes a confession for his crimes against the Martells. When the Mountain is accused with, "You raped her! You murdered her! You killed her children!", although less clearly shown than in the books, the Mountain's problem is not the accusation itself, but that Oberyn got the events in the wrong order. His response is, "I killed her children. Then I raped her. Then I smashed her head in LIKE THIS..."
- Before attending a dangerous peace parley with her enemies, Queen Cersei instructs the Mountain that if things get bloody, he's to kill first Queen Daenerys (as the greatest threat), then her brother Tyrion, then King Jon Snow (commanding the other major Houses opposing her). As for everyone else, he can kill them in whatever order he wants.
- House: Dr. House says to a female patient he dislikes, "If you're gonna kill me and rape me, please do it in that order."
- Jekyll: Benjamin, about to walk into a meeting with Hyde, warns his men "Don't kill him. Or me. In that order."
- In the Married... with Children episode "Peggy and the Pirates", the dreaded pirate Rubio the Cruel (David Garrison) captures the Princess Scarlett (Katey Segall), and gloats, "Now nothing will stop me from marrying you, collecting your dowry, having my way with you, and killing you...! Not necessarily in that order."
- * PennyDreadful: When Roper threatens Vanessa in season 2.
Roper: Real question is, do I scalp her before or after I fuck her?
- Theodore "T-Bag" Bagwell of Prison Break is initially introduced as a creepy and thoroughly despicable sex criminal who was sent to Fox River for raping and murdering numerous children — "not necessarily in that order".
- Jeremy Clarkson once had this gem during his US Top Gear special:
Jeremy: Three religions down here: George Bush, God, Country and Western. In that order. Ascending order.
- Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. In the pilot episode, Commander Sisko meets his Number Two Major Kira on the eponymous Space Station, which he's just taken command of.
Kira: I suppose you want the office.Sisko: Well I thought I'd say "hello" first, and then take the office. But we could do it in any order you like.
- From the British run of Whose Line Is It Anyway?, whilst doing a scene in the style of Greek tragedy:
Julian Clary: I have come to sleep with your mother and then kill her... in that order.
Paul Merton: I'm afraid I've done that already.
Magazines
- The old MAD magazine sendup of "Conquering the Planet of the Apes", as the intelligent ape addresses his army:
All right! If we're going to win against the humans you need to listen up and stop embarrassing me! For example, when I tell you to put on your shoes and socks, I don't mean in that order!
Music
- From the Anti-Christmas Song The Man that Slits the Turkey's Throats at Christmas by Robin Laing:
Some people say I'm cruel, some say that I'm insane,
But the methods I've adopted are really quite humane.
I kill them, draw them, pluck them — it's the best way I have found,
Unless I feel vindictive, when I swap the system round.
Radio
- In the Cabin Pressure episode "Fitton", Arthur tells his mother Carolyn that his father asked after her and the plane, but not in that order.
Theatre
- In The Abduction from the Seraglio, Osmin has a highly detailed plan concerning his rival Pedrillo: "First beheaded, then hanged, then impaled on red-hot spikes, then burned, then manacled and drowned; finally flayed". At least one production (the Zürich Opera video recording with Malin Hartelius and Piotr Beczala) plays up the comedic effect in full: Osmin meticulously stresses the "first", "then", and "finally" (while Pedrillo, amused, counts the threats on his fingers).
Video Games
- In Borderlands 2 - Mr. Torgue's Campaign of Carnage, when Mr. Torgue tells you to find Pyro Pete to secure a sponsor that he kidnapped:
- In the Xel'lotath path of Eternal Darkness, she instructs her Dragon to deal with Charlemagne as follows: "Make sure he is dead... or... insane... Or perhaps first the one, then the other?" Given the nature of the game, doing it in the order given is actually not impossible, as one of the player's characters will find out first hand...
- First Encounter Assault Recon's industrial first level features the following sign on the walls: "Remember it's Quantity, Quality, Safety, in that order."
- Inverted in the trailer for Poker Night at the Inventory
Max: Call him! Raise him! Tear his kneecaps out! Not in that order!
- Warhammer Online has a play on the Schlock Mercenary example specifically, rather than a general example in and of itself: a powerful (for its level) health potion with the description "Next time, pillage before you burn".
Webcomics
- Butch from Chopping Block, evidently, needs a reminder.
- Subverted in The Dementia of Magic: When confronting the witch that poisoned the city, Simon and Matt say they want her head and her poison's antidote respectively, in either order.
- In Exterminatus Now, a captured assassin sneers at the inquisitors that he knows how "interrogation" will mean something silly. Turns out he's wrong.
Eastwood: We will have Lothar here cut your bollocks off and then ask you some questions.
Assassin: ... Don't you mean the other way round?!
Eastwood: No, I'm pretty sure we've got it right. - In Schlock Mercenary, maxim one of The Seventy Maxims of Highly Effective Mercenaries is: "Pillage, then burn."
Web Originals
- Dragon Ball Z Abridged gives one to Goku in the Cooler special. It helps to highlight his... unique mindset.
- Dropout features a variation where Batman, circa The Dark Knight Rises, spends his dying breaths relating how he had sex with Talia, going in detail on how he explored her orifices... and "in an order that'd surprise you", cueing Squick from Bane.
- Hellsing Ultimate Abridged has the two criminals who murdered Seras' parents arguing about this trope.
Sigmund: Now look what you gone and done, you skipped the process!
Freud: What process?!
Sigmund: The standard process of breakin' and enterin'. Yer supposed to shoot the husband, rape the wife, then shoot the wife. You gone and shot the husband, then shot the wife!
Freud: Don't mean nothin'!
Sigmund: 'Course it does! Now we can't rape her!
Freud: I beg to differ; body's still warm!
Sigmund: C'mon now, mate, gotta have standards! I know we're shootin' and rapin', but necrophilia's a step too far! - Averted, maybe, at the end of the first season of Sword Art Online Abridged:
Kirito: [watching as Aincrad slowly falls apart] What's going on down there?
Kayaba: I'm keeping up my end of the bargain, Kirito: As we speak, SAO is being wiped from the servers and all remaining players will be logged out of the game.
Kirito: But, not in that order, right?
Kayaba: ... I'm gonna to have to get back to you on that one.
Western Animation
- From the 100th episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force:
100: Can I rape her and behead her? And not necessarily in that order.
[later]
Studio Exec: "Can I rape her and behead her"? "And not necessarily in that order"? This is a family show!
Dana Synder: Um, yes, I will speak to him about that, yes. - In an early episode of The Fairly OddParents! after Timmy wishes Mark the alien to Earth:
King Gripullon: We will destroy the Earth and get our son back! Not necessarily in that order.
- The Simpsons: Inverted in "The Boys of Bummer"; when Lisa tells Bart she found someone who could cheer him up, he asks if it's his pet rabbit, whom he believes "went to live upstate".
Lisa: He died, Bart. Dad buried him in the backyard. But not in that order.
Real Life
- In England, up until the late 19th century, particularly egregious crimes were punishable by the offender being hanged, drawn and quartered, a method of execution typically involving beheading, castration and disembowelment; and if the offender was lucky, in that order. In reality, the format of such an execution was well-codified, so the best opportunity to spare oneself the agony was to leap from the gallows while you were supposed to be hanged to the edge of death, so that you broke your neck before the serious mutilations took place. In some instances, a ruler would commute the sentence to a quicker death, such as hanging the condemned until dead so all mutilations took place postmortem.
- One Chinese officer from the early 20th century was so treacherous that his Wikipedia page begins with "Shi Yousan (1891 – December 1940) was a KMT general who defected to, and subsequently betrayed, Feng Yuxiang, Chiang Kai-shek, Wang Jingwei, Zhang Xueliang, the Chinese Communist Party, and Japan, in that order."
