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Sexual grooming

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Sexual grooming is the action or behavior used to establish an emotional connection with a vulnerable person – generally a minor under the age of consent[1][2] – and sometimes the victim's family,[3] to lower their inhibitions with the objective of sexual abuse.[4][5] It can occur in various settings, including online, in person, and through other means of communication.[6] Children who are groomed may experience mental health issues, including "anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress, and suicidal thoughts".[5]

History and recognition

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Origins

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Before the term "grooming" was associated with grooming a child for sexual abuse, it had come to have a meaning of mentorship, coaching, or preparing someone for leadership.[7][8]

From 1975 to 1985, law enforcement in the United States became increasingly aware of child sexual abuse that happened to children from outside their family, committed by those who were not strangers.[9] Previously, the focus of law enforcement had been on "stranger danger" and those who used threats of violence to ensure compliance from their victims.[9] In these newly recognized sexual abuse cases, children were manipulated with a "combination of attention, affection, kindness, gifts, alcohol, drugs, money, and privileges".[9] While there are examples before this time where the pattern was recognized, it was during this decade that the FBI became aware of the pattern and criminal investigations were first taken seriously in the United States.[9] There was also growing awareness that offenders joined youth-serving organizations to gain access to potential victims.[9]

As an example, a 1977 study used the terminology "pressured sexual contacts" and "forced sex contacts" to distinguish two types of offenders.[10] Sex-pressure offenses had a lack of physical force and behavior that was counter-aggressive, using "persuasion of reward, attention, affection, money, gifts, or entrapment".[10] "Sex-force offenses" used the threat of harm or physical force, such as "intimidation, verbal threat, restraint, manipulation, and physical strength".[10]

Ken Lanning is credited with being one of the first professionals using the term "grooming".[10] He recalls it being used in conversations between law enforcement professionals, and pinpoints the first known written description of the process of child grooming to a 1979 book written by Nicholas Groth, and the first printed use of the word grooming to a 1984 article by Jon Conte.[9] At the beginning of its use, both grooming and seduction were being used to describe this type of non-violent offender, and Lanning recalls using both terms interchangeably.[9]

A January 1984 FBI Law Enforcement Bulletin used "seduction" and being "seduced" to describe the activity of non-violent offenders.[9] By 1985, the Chicago Tribune had used the term, reporting "These 'friendly molesters' become acquainted with their targeted victim, gaining their trust while secretly grooming the child as a sexual partner."[8]

In the 1980s, the public in the United States became increasingly aware of child sexual abuse through the nursery school cases and abuse in religious settings.[10]

Changing meaning

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During the 1990s, the term grooming was increasingly used to replace "seduction" as the most commonly used term.[9] However, there was not "one official, legal, mental health, or even lay definition" of grooming.[9] Growing awareness of chat rooms being used by pedophiles to target victims came to public notice, and the use of "grooming" to mean "to win the confidence of (a victim) in order to a commit sexual assault on him or her" became mainstream.[8] In academia, the description of grooming strategies in online cases became distinct from the descriptions of pre-Internet grooming strategies.[11]

In 2008, a BBC report stated that "grooming" had taken on a pejorative meaning; no longer associated with animal care or mentoring, it had become associated with pedophiles and pedophilia.[8] This caused outrage when the term "groomed" was used to describe the behavior of someone who had obtained leaked documents from a civil servant.[8] The news report mentioned other uses of the term "groom" that also had negative connotation, such as "groomed for terrorism" or "groomed to become suicide bombers".[8]

A 2022 report by the Christian Monitor, reported that the word "grooming" was now seen as "sinister".[7] Instead of meaning "to prepare as a political candidate ... to prepare or coach for a career", the term had shifted in public discourse to mean "to befriend or influence (a child), now esp. via the internet, in preparation for future sexual abuse".[7] Grooming is also increasingly used in political commentary to mean “indoctrination” or “brainwashing".[7]

Patterns

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Non-violent offenders

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To establish a good relationship with a child and the child's family, child groomers might do several things: they might try to gain the child's or parents' trust by befriending them, with the goal of easy access to the child.[3][12][13] A trusting relationship with the family means the child's parents are less likely to believe potential accusations.[3] Child groomers might look for opportunities to have time alone with the child, which can be done by offering to babysit; the groomers may also invite the child for sleepovers, for opportunistic bed sharing.[14] They might give gifts or money to the child in exchange for sexual contact, or for no apparent reason.[14][15] Commonly, they show pornography to the child, or talk about sexual topics with the child, hoping to make it easy for the child to accept such acts, thus normalizing the behavior.[16][17][18] They may also engage in hugging, kissing, or other physical contact, even when the child does not want it.[14][19]

When grooming techniques are successful, the resulting compliance of the child can be mis-interpreted as consent; and the child treated as if they were not a victim of crime.[9] When the behavior is considered criminal, it can still be perceived as a lesser offense.[9]

Some offenders prefer sexual gratification from less obvious types of behaviors, and grooming behaviors in and of themselves are the goal as they provide a chance to engage in a paraphilia.[9]

Signs that characterize child groomers include: a person who tries to communicate with a child online or in person in secret, outside the knowledge of the child's parents or guardians;[20] a person who attempts to isolate a child from their friends or family, or who discourages the child from spending time with others;[21] or a person who asks a child to keep secrets or who makes the child feel like they are special or important in a way that is inappropriate.[22]

Loverboy or Romeo Pimps

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In some contexts, such as the UK Grooming gangs scandal, the behavior of Loverboy or Romeo Pimps has been described as 'grooming' by the media.[23] Loverboy is a method used to lure young people into sexual exploitation and prostitution, where the target is initially approached romantically by the exploiter.[24] The goal is to exploit the target, usually in the sex industry.[24] Unlike non-violent offenders, once ensnared, victims face blackmail and violence to maintain their compliance.[24]

Online offenders

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Sexual predation of children also occurs on the Internet, and mostly consists of adults using the Internet to meet and seduce underage adolescents into sexual encounters.[25] Some abusers (sometimes posing as children themselves) chat with children online and make arrangements to meet with them in person. Internet initiated sex crimes against minors is most prevalent in relation to the 13–17 age group (99% of cases), and particularly 13–14 (48%). The majority of targeted children are girls, and most victimization occurs with mobile-phone support. Children and teenagers who are highly curious and high-sensation-seeking are at higher risk than others.[26]

Facebook has been involved in controversy as to whether it takes enough precautions against the sexual grooming of children. Jim Gamble, leader of the Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre (CEOP) in the UK, said in 2010 that his office had received 292 complaints about Facebook users in 2009 but that none of the complaints had come directly from Facebook. A spokesman for Facebook responded to complaints by meeting CEOP directly in person, and said that they take safety issues "very seriously".[27] In 2003, MSN implemented chat room restrictions to help protect children from adults seeking sexual conversations with them.[28] In 2005, Yahoo! chat rooms were investigated by the New York State attorney general's office for allowing users to create rooms whose names suggested they were being used for this purpose; that October, Yahoo! agreed to "implement policies and procedures designed to ensure" that such rooms would not be allowed.[29] Computer programs have been developed to analyse chat rooms and other instant messaging logs for suspicious activity.[30] As this can be prevented not only on platform level but also on the point of entry, it is recommended that parents establish safe environments for their children to use the Internet, with reduced risk of encountering cyber grooming individuals.[31]

Pedophiles and predators[32][33][34] use online grooming to carry out cybersex trafficking crimes. After the pedophile gains the trust from a local cybersex trafficker, often a parent or neighbor of the victim, the online sexual exploitation will take place.[35]

Suspected offenders have used the so-called "fantasy defense", the argument that they were only expressing fantasies and not plans of future behavior, to defend actions such as online communication.[36] In the US, case law draws a distinction between those two and some people accused of "grooming" have successfully used this defense.[37] In the US, an online privacy law, Children's Online Privacy Protection Act, has been misinterpreted[38] as a measure to prevent online child grooming and protect children from child predators.[39]

Impact on victims

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Grooming has devastating impacts on victims, damaging their sense of self, eroding their ability to trust others, and severely impacting mental health. Children who are groomed may feel they are to blame for their abuse, and have difficulty placing blame on the perpetrator.[40] Survivors may perceive aspects of human connection as threat cues, and thus may find it difficult to fully engage mentally with simple positive interactions, such as affirmation or compliments.[citation needed]

Many grooming tactics involve isolating a victim through fostering distrust or otherwise sabotaging other close relationships. This directly weakens the potential support network to process traumatic experiences, increasing the risk of long-term psychological ramifications. Victims can be left having been both isolated from existing social connections, and finding it difficult to form new ones.[citation needed]

Criminal offences

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Because sexual grooming is a non-violent and non-threatening form of child sexual abuse, it includes behaviors that do not appear inappropriate on the surface, as the behavior is designed to control and conceal a sexual relationship with the victim.[41] The behavior becomes a criminal act in the United States when one tries to "persuade, induce, entice, or coerce" a minor to engage in sexual activity.[41] As awareness of nonviolent offenders has grown, States like Illinois have passed legislation that bans enticement similar to the federal law.[41]

Other example child sexual abuse offenses include "Solicitation of a Minor,"[42] and "Indecent Liberties with a Child".[43] In Kansas, "Aggravated Indecent Liberties with a Child" is used when an abuser has sex with the child.[43] In Arkansas, the statute is "Sexual indecency with a child". [44]

References

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  1. ^ Christiane Sanderson (2006). Counselling Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse. Jessica Kingsley Publishers. p. 32. ISBN 1843103354. Retrieved April 6, 2016. Counsellors may need to remind survivors that children are not able to give informed consent under the legal age and in the absence of full knowledge of the meaning and ramifications of such behaviour.
  2. ^ Ost, Suzanne (2009). Child Pornography and Sexual Grooming : Legal and Societal Responses. Cambridge, United Kingdom: Cambridge University Press. p. 71. ISBN 9780521885829. The offence relating to grooming can be founder under a.15(1) of the SOA, which provides that an individual aged eighteen or ever (A) commits the offence of "meeting a child following sexual grooming etc" if: [...] (3) B is under 16; and (4) A does not reasonably believe that B is 16 or over
  3. ^ a b c Christiane Sanderson (2006). Counselling Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse. Jessica Kingsley Publishers. p. 30. ISBN 1843103354. Retrieved April 6, 2016. A significant aspect of the grooming process is that the abuser also grooms the child's parents. The abuser dupes the parents into believing that he or she is a trusted adult into whose care they can entrust their child.
  4. ^ Ost, Suzanne (2009). Child Pornography and Sexual Grooming : Legal and Societal Responses. Cambridge, United Kingdom: Cambridge University Press. pp. 33. ISBN 9780521885829. According to Finkelhor's model, there are four preconditions to child sexual abuse. The first is a motivation to sexually abuse a child,
  5. ^ a b "The impact of online grooming". INHOPE. 2022-07-26. Retrieved 2023-03-11.
  6. ^ "Grooming: Know the Warning Signs | RAINN". www.rainn.org. Retrieved 2023-03-11.
  7. ^ a b c d Mohr, Melissa (May 30, 2022). ""Sorting out the changing meaning of 'grooming'"". Christian Science Monitor.
  8. ^ a b c d e f "When did 'grooming' become a dirty word?". BBC News Magazine. December 1, 2008.
  9. ^ a b c d e f g h i j k l m Lanning, Kenneth (2018). "The Evolution of Grooming; Concept and Term" (PDF). Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 33 (1): 17–23. doi:10.1177/0886260517742046. Archived from the original (PDF) on 2021-04-30. Retrieved July 23, 2023.
  10. ^ a b c d e Wolbert Burgess, Ann; Hartman, Carol (2018). "On the Origin of Grooming". Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 33 (1): 5–16. doi:10.1177/0886260517742048.
  11. ^ Ringenberg, Tatiana; Seigfried-Spellar, Kathryn; Rayz, Julia; Rogers, Marcus (January 2022). "A scoping review of child grooming strategies: pre- and post-internet". Child Abuse & Neglect. 123 (2): 228–230. doi:10.1016/j.chiabu.2021.105392. PMC 105392. PMID 9527764.
  12. ^ Ian O'Donnell; Claire Milner (2012). Child Pornography: Crime, Computers and Society. Routledge. p. 59. ISBN 978-1135846282. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  13. ^ Robert Moore (2014). Cybercrime: Investigating High-Technology Computer Crime. Routledge. p. 86. ISBN 978-1317522973. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  14. ^ a b c Christiane Sanderson (2004). The Seduction of Children: Empowering Parents and Teachers to Protect Children from Child Sexual Abuse. Jessica Kingsley Publishers. p. 189. ISBN 184310248X. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  15. ^ Christiane Sanderson (2004). The Seduction of Children: Empowering Parents and Teachers to Protect Children from Child Sexual Abuse. Jessica Kingsley Publishers. pp. 237–238. ISBN 184310248X. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  16. ^ Alisdair A. Gillespie (2012). Child Pornography: Law and Policy. Routledge. pp. 108–109. ISBN 978-1136733826. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  17. ^ Jill S. Levenson; John W. Morin (2001). Treating Nonoffending Parents in Child Sexual Abuse Cases: Connections for Family Safety. SAGE Publications. p. 63. ISBN 0761921923. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  18. ^ Monique Mattei Ferraro; Eoghan Casey; Michael McGrath; Michael McGrath (2005). Investigating Child Exploitation and Pornography: The Internet, the Law and Forensic Science. Academic Press. p. 159. ISBN 0121631052. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  19. ^ Eric Leberg (1997). Understanding Child Molesters: Taking Charge. SAGE Publications. p. 35. ISBN 0761901876. Retrieved April 6, 2016.
  20. ^ "What Are the Warning Signs of Grooming a Child for Sexual Abuse?". Crowe Arnold & Majors, LLP. Retrieved 2023-03-11.
  21. ^ "Grooming and Red Flag Behaviors". Darkness to Light. Retrieved 2023-03-11.
  22. ^ "Grooming: Knowing the Signs". Centre for child protection. 12 September 2019. Retrieved 2023-03-11.
  23. ^ Keynon, Megan (17 June 2025). "The Casey report reveals 15 years of establishment denial". The New Statesman. Retrieved 7 Oct 2025.
  24. ^ a b c "Romeo pimps / loverboys". Government.nl. Government of the Netherlands. Retrieved October 7, 2025.
  25. ^ "Online "Predators" and Their Victims" (PDF). APA.org.
  26. ^ Munro, Emily R. (August 2011). "The protection of children online: a brief scoping review to identify vulnerable groups" (PDF). Childhood Wellbeing Research Centre. Archived from the original (PDF) on 26 May 2012. Retrieved 2013-10-22.
  27. ^ Edwards, Richard (9 April 2010). "Complaints about grooming and bullying on Facebook quadruple". The Daily Telegraph. London.
  28. ^ "MSN begins closing its chatrooms". CNN.com. Oct 15, 2003. Retrieved Jan 21, 2018.
  29. ^ "Yahoo shuts pedophilia-themed chat rooms". Cnet.com. Nov 11, 2005. Retrieved Jan 21, 2018.
  30. ^ "Technology | The 'anti-child grooming' website". BBC News. 3 July 2007. Retrieved 22 October 2013.
  31. ^ Bennett, Daniel (23 March 2020). "What Is Cyber Grooming and How to Protect Children?". TechAcute. Retrieved 14 April 2020.
  32. ^ "Australian cyber sex trafficking 'most dark and evil crime we are seeing'". ABC News. September 7, 2016.
  33. ^ "Former UK army officer jailed for online child sex abuse". Reuters. May 22, 2019.
  34. ^ "Cheap tech and widespread Internet access fuel rise in cybersex trafficking". NBC News. June 30, 2018.
  35. ^ "'We didn't have much to eat': Poverty pushes some kids towards paid sex abuse in the Philippines". CNA. July 9, 2019.
  36. ^ "The Fantasy Defense". CBS Evening News. May 24, 2000. Retrieved Jan 21, 2018.
  37. ^ "Online child grooming" (PDF). Australian Institute of Criminology. Archived (PDF) from the original on 2014-01-26. Retrieved 2023-07-27.
  38. ^ "How the COPPA, as Implemented, Is Misinterpreted by the Public: A Research Perspective | Berkman Klein Center". cyber.harvard.edu. June 12, 2018.
  39. ^ "COMPLYING WITH COPPA: FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS". 20 July 2020.
  40. ^ "Child Sexual Abuse and the "Grooming" Process". Archived from the original on 2015-12-18. Retrieved 2014-01-04.
  41. ^ a b c "Understanding Sexual Grooming in Child Abuse Cases".
  42. ^ "Legal Information: South Carolina 16-15-342. Criminal solicitation of a minor; defenses; penalties".
  43. ^ a b "Kansas Legislature 2012 Statute".
  44. ^ "JUSTIA US Law, Arkansas Code".

Further reading

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  • Kim-Kwang Raymond Choo (2009). Online Child Grooming: A Literature Review on the Misuse of Social Networking Sites for Grooming Children for Sexual Offences. Australian Institute of Criminology. ISBN 9781921185861.
  • "Child sexual exploitation and grooming". www.education.vic.gov.au. Retrieved 2023-03-09.

See also

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