Many of my Christmas-celebrating friends talk about the magic of the season. The smells of the trees, hot chocolate, and other favorite foods, the search for exactly the right gifts, and the anticipation in everyone’s eyes, especially the children.
That’s great. I hope everyone can experience some of that magic this year.
And, I will issue a challenge. Instead of making other people’s wishes come true, what wishes do you choose to make come true for yourself?
We need to know ourselves to see the wishes we want.
How We Might Know Ourselves to See Our Wishes
Sometimes, we can hold up a mirror to see ourselves. Other times, we need perspectives from other people.
I recently told a dear friend that I thought she was the least selfish person I knew.
She said, “Thank you.”
I said, “That’s not a compliment. I don’t think you are living the life you wish. Are you really living the life you wish for? Because you say this thing, but that’s not how you live.”
She paused, her mouth open.
I said, “I’m also guilty of this, but my actions are different from yours. I suspect many of us put other people’s wishes before ours. Is that how we can live our best lives?”
We spoke more, and are still discussing what we really want from our lives. Our actions are too often incongruent with our wishes. That’s about fear.
Fear Changes Our Imagination for Our Wishes
When I was a kid, my teachers often said I was not working towards my potential. To be honest, I didn’t care much about their views of my potential. I only cared about mine.
Now, I realize I have a totally different idea of what my potential can be. And I still let fear change my imagination about all those potential wishes.
When we don’t use our imagination, as kids do in this holiday season, we don’t wish enough—for anything. We live lives that my teachers were afraid of—not living up to our potential.
That’s where we can choose different wishes and then decide how to make them come true.
Which Wishes Do You Choose?
Only you know which wishes you want and which you are willing to prune. There is nothing wrong with deciding that a several-years-ago wish no longer fits for you.
But every decision, even a decision you choose to postpone, is still a decision.
I can’t possibly know your circumstances, so I can’t tell you which of your wishes to choose.
But I can say this: choose something. Give yourself something to look forward to. Give yourself the gift of learning, which means experimenting, failing, and then learning from those failures.
I know this about me: I love the wishes where I’m a little afraid to start, but more afraid to not start. I’m pretty sure I’ll learn something along the way. But that’s the only way I know to make my wishes come true.
Since you are an adult, you might like that too.
I hope you enjoy your holidays, whatever you celebrate.